The words we choose don’t just impact the stories we tell our audience; they impact the stories we tell ourselves. How often do you find yourself saying, “I have to…” or “I need to…” e.g. “I have to do this stupid remote this weekend” or “I need to meet with the boss…”
Try this instead: Replace “I have to…” with “I want to…” or “I get to…” and notice the difference. Typically, the change in language puts you back in charge of your life. “I get to go to the meeting.” You WANT to go to the meeting, because you have a job that is pretty fun; the meeting will only take an hour; it improves your work relationships; it keeps the boss on your side.
I don’t have to do the remote…“I get to do this remote.” I’m lucky that I have a job that pays me; I work with a few people I like; I am lucky I’m not a garbage collector — not that there’s anything wrong with that. I get free coffee. The station still wants to send me out (Imagine the opposite).
And if your task really is horrible, “I get to…” may be a reach. In this case, try “I am willing to…” I am willing to get a root canal…so that my tooth doesn’t hurt anymore, I can chew on that side of my mouth again, and I can stop worrying about it.